2013 Word-of-the-Year

Each year I pick a word to set as my intention for the year. A word that will support me in living out my dreams and to guide me as I make my way through uncharted waters. Honestly, it's not me who picks the word but the other way around.

For 2012, my word was seek and at first it seemed that this word really didn't fit my year. After further reflection and heaps of journaling it seems that seek was right on the money. In the past year I have explored new interests not just in artistic endeavors but also in deepening my spirituality, trying new activities, joining new groups locally and online, trying new classes, and researching and reading in subjects that interest me. I got involved, put myself out there, and got out of the house more. I let go of a great deal of my need for perfection and in turn discovered that I've been missing out on the process in pursuit of the end product. The process really is where it's all at! 

In 2012, I sought tranquility in my home through organization, releasing the clutter, using safer cleaning products, and embracing simplicity. I sought peace within my heart by telling my story, what hurts the most, and speaking my truth. I set myself free by chucking the sensitive label out the door and embracing the gift of my sensitivity, label free. Seek.

My word for the coming year is full of so much possibility packed in two little words. For 2013, I wish to delve into self-care. 

While I packed my schedule with tons of art and activities in 2012 I noticed that I allowed very little time for self-care. I spend way too much time last year sick or recovering from one problem after another. In fact, while I type this I'm recovering from a yucky cold. I've had colds, respiratory infections, sinus issues (that let to a surgery), a routine endoscopy and colonoscopy (that turned into anything but routine), and then add insult to injury I had a piece of bone that had to be surgically removed from my mouth (leftover bone from wisdom teeth removed a good 15 years ago). I'm laughing not complaining because these were inconvenient (and some painful) but none were life-threatening. It is what it is. 

I digress... I'm sick and tired of being sick and tired! I want my good health back and I want my waistline back! I want energy and I want to be able to walk up a flight of stairs without (sounding like) I need a respirator! I want to wake up feeling well rested and I want the strength to open a jar of pickles! Why are you laughing? I seriously can't open a jar to save my life! LOL. Ok, maybe to save my life but not before then. :-D

Anyway, where was I? Oh yeah.

This is the year I take care of myself mind, body, and spirit. 

Self-Care.

Hugs,

P.S.

Have you picked your 2013 word yet? Here are a few helpful resources to hone in on your word:

- Unravelling the Year Ahead

- The Authentic Dreaming Worksheet

- The Inquiring Heart : Questions to Inspire Deeper Experience

- The Complete Your Year Worksheet

Emotional Self-Discovery :: Part II :: The Highly Sensitive Person

Last week I shared Part I (Unwrapping the Gift of Empathy) of what may very well become a blog series as I continue my research. This week I would like to share my findings on the Highly Sensitive Person (HSP). Apparently HSP is interchangeable with empath and seem to share the same traits.

In 1997, Dr. Elaine Aron released her book The Highly Sensitive Person: How to Thrive When the World Overwhelms You after years of research on the trait. There is an estimated 15 to 20% of the population who are highly sensitive. HSP is intrinsic, and according to Dr. Aron, "reflects a certain type of survival strategy, being observant before acting." HSPs are intuitive, notice more, aware of subtleties, and reflect more deeply. HSPs can easily become overstimulated and overwhelmed when situations become chaotic and intense. HSPs are often mislabeled as shy and introverted. The scientific term is Sensory-Processing Sensitivity (SPS).

Common characteristic behaviors of HSPs:

• Are you easily overwhelmed by such things as bright lights, strong smells, coarse fabrics, or sirens nearby?
• Do you get rattled when you have a lot to do in a short amount of time?
• Do you make a point of avoiding violent movies and TV shows?
• Do you need to withdraw during busy days, into bed or a darkened room or some other place where you can have privacy and relief from the situation?
• Do you make it a high priority to arrange your life to avoid upsetting or overwhelming situations?
• Do you notice or enjoy delicate or fine scents, tastes, sounds, or works of art?
• Do you have a rich and complex inner life?
• When you were a child, did your parents or teachers see you as sensitive or shy?

Dr. Aron has a Self Test on her website.

Dr. Susan Biali shares helpful survival tips on Psychology Today for those living the HSP life. Boy can I relate! I usually keep my lights super dim in my living room where I spend most of my time, despise loud and crowded areas and events, can't watch the news, and plan my life around having "me time."

I'm suddenly noticing others sharing their HSP stories, survival tips, and discovery: Tiny Buddha, Hannah, and Susannah. I think this goes back to what I said in Part I, these beautiful people and articles are noticeable to me now because I'm finally ready to receive the information and knowledge they have to share with me.

I am no longer willing to shame myself for my "weird" behaviors and emotions. I'm much more grounded and stable than I have ever been and I'm ready to receive the truth the universe has to share with me and the teachers it chooses to send my way. This is the spot where I'm firmly planted and these roots run deep. I am strong. I am complex. I am me.

Sensitively yours,

P.S.
Last month I took the Clifton Strength Finder assessment to discover my top 5 unique traits (of 34). Major revelation in 3-2-1...my #1 top strength is Empathy! LOL. The universe is at work here. :-)

Emotional Self-Discovery :: Unwrapping the gift of Empathy

Today I want to share with you something that I learned recently about myself that has made my “weirdness” finally make sense. I’ve heard people talk about being an empath but it always went right over my head. I guess I wasn’t quite ready to connect the dots.

In October, I took Hannah Marcotti’s Spirits of Joy in which there was also a Facebook group to share your responses to prompts. Day 23’s prompt was: Take a quality that you believe you possess that you wish you could change. Explore shifting this, molding it, expanding it, working with it. This was my response:

A dear sweet soul responded to me with this:

YouTube Link

I checked it out and holey-moley, it was like Dr. Orloff was talking about me personally! Things finally started to make sense as to why I do certain things which seem odd to others but aligns perfectly with being an empath. My sensitivity (which I’ve written about here many times), my need to have space with myself after crowded events, wanting to always drive myself so I have a getaway car (LOL), finding it necessary to retreat during heated debates, my mood changes after being around negative people (energy vampires), my carrying of other peoples burdens, my tendency to anxiety and depression, my inability to live with others, my finding relationships overwhelming, my emotional overeating, and my sensitivity to smells, sounds, and voices. There is a reason for all of this!

I was intrigued by what Dr. Judith Orloff could share and have since picked up her book Emotional Freedom in hopes that it will help guide me on ways to block out negative energy, not carry the emotions of others, feel more grounded, and to use this gift to help others instead of hurting myself.

I feel so empowered to now have some answers to my emotional quandary! If this is something you’re familiar with I would love to hear what you have to share. Let’s help each other and learn from each other.

Hugs,

Tender Heart

I shared with you recently that I’m working through Spirits of Joy from Hannah Marcotti. One of the daily joy prompts was, “I am.” in which we finish the sentence. She encouraged us to look through magazines, listen to music, or whatever until our I am appeared.

“Express who you see in your visions of you, who you know in your spirit you are.”

I thought about it all day, looked through magazines and catalogs, and I thought and thought and then thought some more yet my I am continued to allude me. Later that evening I was having a mental conversation with myself about something unrelated – please tell me I’m not the only one who does this! – and at some point I internally responded (to myself), “I can’t help it, I have a tender heart.” And then BAM! It hit me, I am a tender heart. That’s my I am!

I’ve shared with you here before about how I’m sensitive but after much hating on myself I realized that sensitive isn’t necessarily a bad thing. It means that I’m more observant and understanding to the feelings of those around me.

sen·si·tive/ˈsensitiv/

Adjective:  Quick to detect or respond to slight changes, signals, or influences.

Synonyms:  responsive - aware - receptive - tender - perceptive - insightful

ten·der/ˈtendər/

Adjective:  Showing gentleness and concern or sympathy.

Synonyms:  soft - delicate - gentle - mild - affectionate - loving - caring - kind - kindhearted - warm - sympathetic

I am a tender heart. <3

With much love,