Last night I had sadness and guilt weighing on my heart so heavy that I knew I needed to uncover and deal with it. After much internal dialogue I realized that I had been having unkind thoughts towards another that I even went as far as verbalizing these thoughts to a dear friend yesterday morning. The sadness appeared shortly after and remained until I finally questioned the reason.
I was sad because, although this person had unintentionally hurt me in the past, I had no reason to respond in the same unkind way back. Even though she would never know of these thoughts, I knew and it hurt me deep in my sould that I would have this reaction to her.
One of my values that I hold to a high standard is being non-judgemental yet that was exactly what I was doing - judging her.
Oh the tears flooded my eyes to this thought.
Then the question I pondered - How do I change this?
The answer was simple. Loving-kindness.
According to The Joy of Living by Yongey Mingyur Rinpoche, loving-kindness is a Buddhist philosophical term that all "beings - even those we dislike - experience the same sense of joy and freedom that we ourselves aspire to feel."
"Look on everyone you see with an open, loving heart." ~Santideva, The Bodhicaryavatara
Instead of unkind thoughts I should have compassion and send loving light their way. I know, that's easier said than done. You don't have to like that person or their actions but spreading a little love may help you like them and yourself a little bit more. Why? Here's the kicker -
"If we were to make a list of people we don't like...we would find a lot about those aspects of ourselves that we can't face." ~Pema Chodron from Start Where You Are
Wow. How're you feeling now?
So now I ask you, are there people in your life you